... they belong here a nipple on our love’s chest pierced by suspicion smothered in dream and silence we lay on this rotten bed of thoughts day and night alone/ restless/ unattended watching it grow between us like a tumour
i don t know exactly why, but i think i like it. and i think that s connectot to the last comparation, although i would see it more materialistic if posible. i mean, not a tumour growing in the air or something like this, but something more organic. the rest o this is more or less not really new (that s not a problem, but, not being so, and being already used s many time, it doesn t tell me a lot), i mean, a nice begining for the poem, but after that lots of words that i am full of such as dream, alone, silence ...
lies and tumours are thriving on unhealthy grounds, they are not meant to be there, they are not part of the norms as we know it. i find the environment quite appropriate (silence, dream, alone).. my poetry will never cling to big words, I do not believe in them, never did..:)
2 comments:
i don t know exactly why, but i think i like it.
and i think that s connectot to the last comparation, although i would see it more materialistic if posible. i mean, not a tumour growing in the air or something like this, but something more organic.
the rest o this is more or less not really new (that s not a problem, but, not being so, and being already used s many time, it doesn t tell me a lot), i mean, a nice begining for the poem, but after that lots of words that i am full of such as dream, alone, silence ...
lies and tumours are thriving on unhealthy grounds, they are not meant to be there, they are not part of the norms as we know it.
i find the environment quite appropriate (silence, dream, alone)..
my poetry will never cling to big words, I do not believe in them, never did..:)
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